IFH 320: Are You A Bitter & Angry Filmmaker?

Right-click here to download the MP3

Are you a bitter and angry filmmaker? Do you hate on other filmmaker’s success? Be honest! Then I hate to tell you but you are a Hater. On this episode, we dive into the mindset of being a bitter and angry filmmaker. I was bitter for most of my filmmaking career. Every time a new, young filmmaker would come into my edit suite with their $3 million indie film I’d say to myself…

“Why did he get a shot? I’m as good as him. I’ve been busting my ass for years and no one is giving me any chances. This is some BS!”

It took me years to break free of that mindset. It was only hurting me and my filmmaking career. This episode might be the cold bucket of water over your head that you have been needing. Getting ready for it. And if you are not that bitter and angry filmmaker then please share it with that bitter filmmaker in your life cause we ALL have one of those in our circle of filmmaking friends. Enjoy.

Alex Ferrari 3:15
So guys, today I have a question for you. Are you a hater? Are you someone who hates on other people's successes? When you see an article or post or a podcast or a video about someone else's another filmmakers and other screenwriters success in this business? Does your immediate feeling about it be a one of hate being one of oh well they got this that or they had this opportunity or that opportunity? And that's why they succeeded. If you are, and I hate to tell you, my friend, but your hater. And I wanted to talk a little bit about this because a few weeks ago, I released an episode about Jonathan Perry, a very young film director who's 17 and got an Amazon Studios deal actually he's the youngest film director Ever to get a deal with a streaming service, let alone Amazon Studios off of an unfinished short film. And those are extremely popular podcasts a lot a lot of people loved a lot of people were really happy with Jonathan, I did see in comments and posts and things like that a lot of haterade going on. Just a lot of people out there just hating on Jonathan success. And it wasn't anything personal with Jonathan, it was just the mere fact of his story. It happened a little bit before when I talked about Kansas bowling, she did she was a 17 year old film director who shot a feature film on 16 millimeter and sold it to distribution when she was still 17. And there was a lot of hate back then, as well. And I just kind of realized, Oh, and by the way, there's been hate on many episodes, the range 15 guys, when they made $3 million off of their movies in their whole story, I would see a little bit of hate here and there. But I got a real big wave of the hate off of that one podcast from a few weeks ago with Jonathan. So I said, I think this is something that needs to be addressed. Because I think it's not only a problem for the people being hated on, but I think it's even a larger problem for the people who are hating. Now, I always tell people when I when I speak publicly, I always ask them, we all know angry and bitter filmmakers. And if you don't know any angry and bitter filmmakers, you are the angry and bitter filmmaker. Now, I'm gonna tell you a little bit about my history of hating, okay, because I am not immune to this. I was an angry, angry, angry and bitter filmmaker for so so so so many years. If you guys read my book shooting for the mob, you'll understand where a lot of that hate came from. Being so close to your dream, having it literally inches away from your face, and getting pulled away, like it did in that time of my life, made me very angry made me very bitter for over 15 years easily. And on to add more to that, you know, I was in post production. So as a as a post guy and editor, a colorist post supervisor, I would work with many, many filmmakers. And every single time I would get a young, you know, filmmaker who was in his early 20s, who had never directed a feature film, and someone gave them two or $3 million. You know, I was I was there to help them, you know, bring their vision to life. But underneath it all, there was hate man, there was just this anger and bitterness towards their success. Because I would always say to myself, well, why didn't happen to me? I have I have as much, if not more talent and experience is that filmmaker? Why didn't I get the shot? Why didn't someone show up at my door with a million or 2 million or $3 million to go make a feature film? Why am I not getting mine. And that was my mentality. That was the mentality that held me back for So, so so long in my life. I want you to understand something, that success is a result of your thinking. Success is a result of your work. And success is a result of your hustle. It's cause and effect. This is what the universe is made out of cause and effect. Cause of your success or cause of your failure is up to you. Your failure to achieve your goals in this business are a direct result of what's going on underneath in side of you. Whatever results you're getting in your life, or in your career, whether good or bad. Remember, your outer world is a reflection of your inner world. If you're hating on people, if you're leaving comments on Facebook and Twitter and YouTube and anywhere else on the internet, it says a lot more about who you are than about who you are hating upon. I really truly believe that I truly believe that whatever you're putting out into the universe will come back to you in one way, shape or form. Whether is that manifestation of a lack in your career, in your career, in your dream and what you're trying to achieve in this business or in life. I do truly believe that what you do put out does come back to you. So if you're hating on people and you're asking yourself Wow. Um, I'm really, really not getting to where I want to be. Let me ask you a question. Do you think that David Fincher Christopher Nolan, Steven Spielberg, Steven Soderbergh? Do you think any of these guys are sitting around hating on other people? Do you think any of them are truly spending exerting any mental energy on hating on other people and being bitter about someone else's success? Now, I know a lot of you're saying right now, and if you're saying this is a perfect reason why you should be listening to this podcast. If you're saying right now, well, Alex, that Steven Spielberg, he's one of the greatest filmmakers of all time. He's rich, he's he's super, super successful as many Oscars, why would he be hating on anybody? If you think that, then you should be listening to this up this podcast. Because I promise you, when Stephen was not a billionaire, and was not one of the most successful filmmakers of all time, I promise you, he was not sitting down, thinking about why somebody else was getting an opportunity. And he didn't, he was too busy making his own opportunities. He was too busy hustling, he was too busy working and being creative, and creating content, creating movies, creating opportunities for himself. Rather than just think about what I don't have, because someone else took it, that mentality is what's going to hold you back, and it is holding you back, it held me back for almost 20 years of my life. And when I finally let go of it, I can't tell you the freedom. And I can't tell you the things that have happened in my life. In every forest, in every farm anywhere in the world, it is what you can't see, that creates, what you can see, it is the seeds, and the roots, that create the reality that we can perceive in our eyes. They have to be there, the seeds and the deep roots have to be there before you see a mighty Sequoia, or an oak tree. The magic that happens underneath that ground that things that we can perceive by our naked eye is what the magic is of creating those things. And that those seeds and those roots that I'm talking about is your mind is your thoughts. I truly, truly, truly think that using powers that you can't see is the most powerful thing you have to achieve your dreams to achieve your goals in life, your mindset, your thinking, the programming that you're putting inside of you the habits that you're creating inside of you. And I know some of you're saying Alice, what are you talking about things you can't see how can I use something I can't see? Well, you use electricity, don't you? Every day, your entire life revolves around the use of electricity, though we can't see it. And if you do see it, run. But generally, we don't see electricity. But it powers our homes, it powers our cars, it powers our computers, it powers our entire way of life. But yet it is something we can't see or can't feel, generally speaking. And if you don't believe that electricity is a power that runs your entire world, try sticking your finger in a socket, you're gonna figure it out real quick that it's there. Don't please disclaimer, don't stick your finger in a socket is just an analogy guys. But using those powers, using those things that your mindset, your thinking, the programming the habits that you create, to achieve your dreams is more powerful than anything. You can see. When you hate on someone else's success, you end up hurting your own success. What you focus on, expands. If you expand on negativity, then that is what's going to come back to you. If you are focusing only negative things on bitterness on anger in your life, then that is what you're going to get more of in your life. When I changed the way I started thinking about my life about being angry at other filmmakers or other people's successes in every aspect of my life, it was even back in the day when I saw a guy with a beautiful girl and go Why does he have a beautiful girlfriend and I don't It was that mentality of lack mentality that I can't, I can't do that, because someone else has it. That mentality is deadly. And when I released it finally, and I'll just talk about how I released it in my, in my professional career, when I just stopped hating on other people's successes, and stop being bitter and angry, I made my first feature film. I made this as mech. And the second I made the decision to make my first feature, and did not hate as much or at all at other people's successes. then things started opening up a second, I made that decision. And it was quick, guys, it was very, very quick, I just made the choice. And from that point on, amazing, amazing things have happened to me, you guys have been listening to me for a while. So you know, there's been a lot of wonderful successes that happened in my life, and many wonderful things that are happening in my life. Hell, I get to do this full time. You know, this is my full time job helping filmmakers helping the tribe in one way, shape, or form, putting out content there that inspires them, that moves them forward. that educates them. While I'm educating myself and inspiring myself on a daily basis. I'm living my dream, and I'm so so grateful for it. But I don't wake up in the morning thinking, Well, why does that website have more followers than I do? Or what is that podcast? Maybe get more? More listens than I do? I did. Don't get me wrong, I'm not perfect. I did think that way. But I stopped. I stopped. Because at the end of the day, it doesn't do me any good. And I promise you, it won't do any good for you. And is it doing any good for you. I challenge you for the next 30 days, not to hate on anyone not to hate on anyone else's successes. When you read a story in the news or on variety or on Facebook or wherever I want you to consciously not hate on them. And for God's sakes, please don't leave any negative remarks or comments about someone else's success. Oh, well, he just got this or he's just got that. I challenge you for 30 days. Not to hate on people don't hate on the Russo brothers for making Avengers end game and making 350 kazillion. dollars on opening weekend. Don't hate on the 17 year old filmmaker who got signed to Amazon off of an unfinished short film. Not anyone do not hate on anyone, do not be bitter about anyone else's success. Do not be angry about any one else's success. And if you do that for 30 days, I want you guys to please email me message me, tweet at me, whatever tag me on a post. Let me know what happens in your life. Let me know if there's been any change any movement at all. Because I promise you, if you make that small, little switch, something might not be huge, not going to get a huge giant thing, maybe you will, maybe you won't. A huge opportunity is going to show up on your front door. But I promise you that you'll feel better, you'll probably have a little bit more energy to put towards something positive, maybe learn a little bit more, maybe work a little bit harder on the things that you want to do. But I promise you that. So challenge yourself for the next 30 days. Not to be bitter or angry or hate on anybody else's success. And let me know how it goes for you guys. I wanted to do this episode because I really felt that was something important to talk about. And again, I don't hear anybody else talking about things like this. So I said, You know what, I think this is something that needs to be addressed. I think this is going to help the tribe because Damn it, man, it helped me. It helped me so so much. And I promise you I was one of the angriest embitters filmmakers you would ever meet. I was so angry. So if this isn't new, and you aren't an angry and bitter filmmaker, talk to the bitter filmmaker, that you do know the angry filmmaker, send him or her this podcast, and maybe it will help them. Maybe it will give them a different point of view. I don't know. Maybe they'll start hating on me for doing this podcast. It's okay. I don't mind I can take it. I'm just trying to help. And I'm just trying to to help the tribe and help to anyone who decides to listen to this stuff that I'm putting out. out there in the world. So I hope this episode helps you guys, I really, really do. I've got a couple of books that I'm going to put in the show notes at indiefilmhustle.com/319. And hopefully they'll help you out a little bit. They, these, these books have helped me out a bunch. So hopefully, they'll help you out a little bit on your journey to be a less bitter and angry filmmaker. But I do promise you guys something, man. If you don't change that mentality, if you don't focus on things that are positive things that you're grateful for things that you will move you forward and towards what you want in life. You're never going to get out of where you were at. That I promise you because man, I didn't move barely anything for 20 years. It took me a long time to figure this out. But the second I did the second I made that switch my entire life changed. So I hope I can make that change for you guys. I hope that this episode does that for you. Thank you for listening. So so much, guys. I truly appreciate it. If you haven't already, please head over to filmmaking podcast, calm and leave a good review, or this podcast on iTunes. It really, really really helps us out in the rankings and getting this information out to as many filmmakers and screenwriters as humanly possible. Thank you guys again, so much for your support. I truly, truly appreciate it. As always keep that also going. Keep that dream alive. stop hating. And I'll talk to you soon.

LINKS

SPONSORS

  1. Bulletproof Script Coverage – Get Your Screenplay Read by Hollywood Professionals
  2. AudibleGet a Free Filmmaking or Screenwriting Audiobook
  3. Rev.com – $1.25 Closed Captions for Indie Filmmakers – Rev ($10 Off Your First Order)

IFH 084: How Filmmakers & Artists Should Deal with Haters!

Right-click here to download the MP3

Haters, a problem that artists, filmmakers or anybody who puts themselves out there have to deal with. I know of many filmmakers who are crippled by what other people think or say about them. The fact is that you are going to create anything; a poem, write a novel, make a movie, write a song, cook a meal or build a house, there will be people who have opinions.

Now opinions are fine. As they say, ever has an opinion and the internet has given everyone with an opinion a voice. Now there are constructive, mature opinions and there are straight-up haters. People who want to bring you down for a myriad of reasons.

I decided to shine a bit of light on this topic because it is so important on your filmmaking journey to be free of the good opinions of others, as the late Wayne Dyer used to say. You can not allow other people’s opinions or thoughts to bring you down or stop your forward momentum when making art of any kind.

Take a listen to my experience with haters I’ve dealt with over the years. I hope it inspires you to continue creating regardless of the good opinion of others.

“Don’t let compliments get to your head and don’t let their criticism get to your heart.” – Anoyomous

Alex Ferrari 0:00
So guys today, you know I wanted to do this episode, because I think it's something that every artist and anybody who puts themselves out in the public at all has to deal with. I'm talking about haters. Now. I always like to say that haters you know, drinking you know haterade by the by the by the palette, they're buying the haterade of Costco that's how much they hate sometimes and you know when I first did my first movie back in 2005 and you know I got I'm really put myself out there pretty heavily with with that short film broken. And I got a lot of reviews, a lot of great reviews on the movie and just a lot of love. And the second I got a Roger Ebert quote, I'm not kidding you I had four or five bad reviews back to back the back to back right after that. And the haterade the haters, if you will, came out with such vengeance and just veracity that was it's still out there somewhere online if you want to check them out. They're hilarious, the the reviews and comments and things like that it was actually quite brilliant. And if these guys would just put a little effort into making their own movies, as opposed to all the effort into hating me back then. Maybe things will be a little different. But I wanted to talk about haters and people who don't believe in what you're doing. And a lot of times just trolls or haters that just go after you because of whatever reason they want to go after you for whether it be jealousy, whether it be just who they are. And that's the one thing I want to kind of really stress out about this. You're not going to make everyone happy as an artist. As a filmmaker, you're going to make movies that cannot you can't make everyone happy period. Some people might not like your style. Some I pick my people not like the way you do things, or the way you make your movies. But can you imagine the amount of haters that Robert Rodriguez, uh, Quinn, Tarantino, uh, Kevin Smith, a spike lee, a David Fincher, Chris Nolan, all these guys have had their haters. I know it's hard to believe. But all you got to do is just go on google and type in. Let's say this Shawshank Redemption, arguably one of the greatest movies of all time. I've yet to meet many people, if any at all. Who don't either like it love it. I think it's the greatest movie of all time, or at least it didn't enjoy it. They acknowledge it being a very well told story. I've never heard of, I've never met anyone who disliked it, like just really disliked it. Well, if you just go on to Google and go, Shawshank Redemption, bad review, you will read bad reviews of Shawshank Redemption, and it'll make you feel better if someone's crapping on your stuff. I mean, not that your stuff is, or my stuff for that matter is as good as Shawshank Redemption. But it just shows you that no matter how good something is, there's always going to be someone hate and always going to be haters out there. And I know it affects a lot of people differently. Specifically, you know, I've been around for 20 odd years, and I've gone through this multiple times with my projects, anytime you put your projects out there, especially on the internet, people will hate people will leave comments, people will do whatever they want to do. And that's fine. And that's who they are. And, and you have to understand that you can't, you won't, you have to understand that people are going to be who they are. So if they're nasty people, they're going to be nasty. If a frog is going to be a frog, you can't be angry at them for being the frog. You know, you just can't, you know, if you are hanging out with a snake and the snake bites you, you can't be angry at the snake because that's what snakes do. You know, that's what their nature is. So if people are going to hate that might just be who they are. They might be dealing with other things that they're dealing with, in their own personal lives. And this is the way they get it out. Who knows, maybe they just want to hate just for the sake of hating. And that's fine. It's completely acceptable if you want to, I mean, not acceptable, I don't accept it. I think it's horrible. You know, everyone has an opinion. And I've always tried to be very constructive with my opinions. I try not to be juvenile with my opinions, on on movies on on people because it's very difficult to make a movie, it's very difficult to make art to put yourself out there as an artist, it's very difficult to have a podcast to have a blog, a public blog, where it's you know, 1000s upon 1000s of people read it every day. And you know, people will have their opinions on what you have to say about things and that's okay opinions are everyone has them you know, just like they say opinions are like assholes. Everyone's got one you know, I don't mean to be rude crude about it, but it's the truth. You know, so, you know, I have a couple sayings I love to hear anytime I get haters or people dislike something I'm doing. And it says basically, a tiger doesn't lose sleep over the opinion of a sheep. And, you know, and I think that was such a great, great saying, because, look, I've studied so many different filmmakers over the course of my career. You know, the Ridley Scott's the Chris Nolan's The David Fincher is the Tarantino's. And I've noticed that among all these people, especially anybody at the top level, anybody that's made it to the higher echelons of whatever field they're in. One thing they all have in common, is generally speaking, they don't let other people's opinion really matter that much. They just go forward. You know, Ridley Scott has not read a review of his movies, I think since some of the early ones he made prior to Blade Runner. Because I mean, someone like Ridley Scott has been, you know, bashed so many times over the years for the kind of movies because you know what, you know, you're not going to bat 1000 on all your movies, every artist, every filmmaker, you're not going to be making, you know, homeruns Oscar winning things every single time. It doesn't work that way. Art doesn't work that way. So, you know, someone like him, he just kind of just puts his head down. He's like, I don't listen to it. I just do me. And that's my advice to you guys. You're always gonna have people around you who don't believe in you who are hating on you just literally just because they have their own issues and they want to hate on you. There's other people who are going to try to bring you down and of the day guys, is just listen to yourself. And, and, and just do you just do you do the art you want to do, do the movies you want to make. Do you think that someone like Lloyd Kaufman, who runs troma films, who's been a guest on our show, and I'll leave a link in that in the in the in the show notes. Lloyd makes movies like Toxic Avenger, and class of nukem Hi. And you know, by all accounts, a lot of people do not like his movies. They're not for everyone. You know, they're not supposed to be mass consumption. They're not for mass consumption. They are for a niche crowd. There's a lot of people who just don't like him or how he's been doing things. And you know, he's been doing it for like, 30 odd 40 years now. And he doesn't care. You know, as you get older, by the way, comedian Wanda Sykes always says, As you get older, you give less of a fuck. And it's very true. Because what they don't care, they don't care what they look like, they don't care, but they just don't care. They just don't care. And as you get older, you you kind of give less of a shit about what other people think. And some people are crippled by artists, I know a lot of artists, a lot of filmmakers who are crippled by it. And it's something that it bothered me very, when I was early on in my career bothered me a lot. But it doesn't bother me anymore. You know, of course, you you want, you don't want people to talk bad about you about about about your work as an artist or bad about what you're doing. But you know what, at the end of the day, you know, they're not paying your bills, they're not looking at, you're looking at you in the mirror at the end of the day, they're just doing them. So instead of just concentrating on them, concentrate on you concentrate on what you want to do, and don't exert any energy, by reading comments, by looking at what they're doing, or what they're saying. Just do you, you know, can you imagine all of these big music stars like a Justin Bieber or Drake, or Beyonce, or Jay Z, or m&m or any of these guys, I mean, people have just completely tried to tear them down, and they just shake it off, they don't care. You know, they just keep doing it. Because it's not positive for themselves. It's not positive for their own artistic journey, their own personal journey, they just got to keep going. So my advice, guys, is to just do you. Don't worry about what other people are saying about you. People are going to hate, don't try to defend yourself, to try to go after anybody. Because at the end of the day, it's all about you on your journey. As a filmmaker, as an artist, as a human being as a soul, whatever you want to call it, you got to do you, and not worry about what other people are going to do, because other people are going to do what they are going to do. And you have no control over that. All you have control of is how you react to when things happen to you in life. Not you can't control the circumstances. All you can control is how you react to the circumstances. How do you react to the haters? Drinking that haterade by the gallon. It's up to you guys to keep going because I've seen too many artists in my career and my travels, I've seen too many artists who get sidetracked because are really crippled sometimes because of negative comments, people trying to bring them down, all sorts of stuff. And that's just the way things are. So please, do you guys. Don't worry about what other people think about what you're doing. Just do you. Now, with that said, Okay, with that said, as an artist, if you're listening to constructive criticism, yes, listen to constructive criticism, because that helps you grow as a filmmaker, as an artist. If it's something constructive, if you're doing something and there's just a wave of people who just like, Look, this is not if you're trying to achieve reaction a and 80% of the people who watch your movie are not getting reaction a well you should probably understand why they're not getting it and maybe listen to what they're saying. And then maybe adjust accordingly. But if there's just people who are just hate and be like, oh, look what he's doing. Oh, look at that. Oh, they add Ooh, boo, boo boo. That's not constructive. By the way, that was a great impression of a hater. I'm just I'm just But anyway, so guys, don't worry about what other people say about what you're doing and who you are, and any of that kind of crap. It's a lot of times it's just bullies. And the internet is full of these trolls and bullies who who love to sit behind their keyboard, anonymously, just spewing crap just to spew You know, and I really wish not only them but everyone only good things in their lives. I hope that every every hater out there eventually gets to where they want to go, you know and if they do that maybe they'll stop hating on other people and maybe stop criticizing other people and trying to bring other people down. I really wish them nothing but love and support and good things on all their future projects. So from the bottom of my heart everyone listening, just do you and don't let anybody else try to bring you down guys to download the show notes go to indie film hustle comm forward slash zero 84 for all the links and things we talked about in the show. And don't forget to head over to free film book calm that's free film book calm to download your free film audio book from audible. So guys, thank you for listening. Please spread the word on indie film hustle on the podcast and on this as Meg if you can, I really appreciate it. And keep that hustle going keep that dream alive and I'll talk to you soon.

YOUTUBE VIDEO

LINKS

SPONSORS

  1. Bulletproof Script Coverage – Get Your Screenplay Read by Hollywood Professionals
  2. AudibleGet a Free Filmmaking or Screenwriting Audiobook
  3. Rev.com – $1.25 Closed Captions for Indie Filmmakers – Rev ($10 Off Your First Order)